Rejoice in golden hues...

I love autumn.  It is by far my most favorite season.  I love the cooler weather, the crisp smell in the morning, and the colors...man, the colors in autumn are unparalleled.  I was so excited to be able to take Desmond to a pumpkin patch and for a drive out into Missouri wine country.  This time around, Desmond kind of knew what was happening and he actually enjoyed being out and about.  Unlike this one time (pictures from October 2010):

Not enjoying the splendor of autumn...

So uncomfortable...

Hating life.

We went to a farm in Augusta, Missouri, which just happens to be part of "wine country."  Yes, Missouri is home to several vineyards and the wine they produce isn't that bad.  This area of the state, just about 50 minutes west of St. Louis, was settled primarily by German immigrants, so a lot of the towns that are scattered throughout the area have vestiges of those old German towns.  It's such a beautiful drive.  We timed it so that we left around the time of Desmond's nap so that he could sleep the majority of the drive to the farm.  We got to the farm and it had a play area for kids, a maze, scarecrows, etc.  Nobody was there, so we had the entire place to ourselves, and got to have our pick of the better pumpkins.  I can now understand why parents go crazy over places like this...it's so much fun to see your kid run around and enjoying the fruits of fall.

This time, we had better luck with the pictures (compare with above):

It's funny how I still think of myself as being 22 or o and then I look at this picture and notice that I'm starting to get wrinkles around my eyes and am floored.  I certainly don't feel 30...but I look it.

Now this is the face of a kid who loves fall.

Look at the tin man!  And Dorothy looks like she's in dire need of a bathroom.

I'm so in love with these guys...

He wasn't as creeped out as I thought he'd be. 

I mean, I sure as hell was.

He looks like a little mini movie director.

Desmond's trademark Eff Off face.

Cute.

But this one's cuter.

We wanted to get a series of shots of him sitting in the tractor tire, to match the awful ones of him we took last year. 

We tried so hard to get him to sit by the tractor.

But he wasn't having any of it.

At a vineyard.

Ok, so now the cheesy part (Yes, I know the pictures themselves are super cheesy.  Humor me here, ok?)  I know I keep beating this dead horse over and over again, but being a mom is hard work.  Super hard.  Harder than anything else I've ever done.  I mean, learning how to write code in SAS is far easier in my book than being pregnant, giving birth, being the sole life-sustaining force for a newborn, and changing so much as a person with each milestone Desmond has achieved.  He's already shaking his head no (and wagging his finger back and forth for emphasis), can hold up one finger when I ask him "Cuantos años tienes?," and teases me by offering me pieces of his food and then taking them away.  I'm not the same mother I was a year ago.  Heck, I'm not the same mother I was 3 months ago.  He is constantly changing and I'm realizing, that like the beautiful colors of fall, this milestone, these moments, will soon come to an end and I will never, ever relive them with him.

Being outside with Desmond, watching the wind ruffle his (very straight) hair, and seeing the most joyful, explosive smile on his face when he picks up the leaves and crumples them in his hands...it's the most wonderful thing.  Better than wearing new underpants wonderful.  I am trying to sit back, take it all in, and cherish these sweet, simple moments because in another year, he's going to be yelling "NO" at me instead of showing me, he'll be saying "one" when I ask him how old he is, and he probably won't offer me anymore of his food (he probably won't eat any of the food I offer him...sigh.)

So, here's to the last few weeks of fall and to rejoicing in those golden moments in life.  I'll take them when I can get 'em...

Deal for breastmilk???

Breastmilk is now mainstream, thanks to the help of the "deal-of-the-day" website Groupon, which offers gift certificates for local companies in your area.  You could get a gift certificate for, say, Mexican food at The Red Iguana and pay $20 for $40 worth of food.  It's a fantastic service and I use it frequently.  However, it usually caters to service-based companies, like restaurants, yoga studios, and massage parlors (parlors?  What are they called?  Centers?)  So, imagine my shock (and jubilation!) when I read a Time magazine article about a Groupon offer in Indiana to buy $10 worth of breastmilk.  It definitely caught my attention, so I read on...

The fine print explained what was going on: philanthropy. People who purchased the deal weren't getting cutthroat bargains on breast milk for themselves; instead, the money raised would be used by the milk bank to offset the cost of providing human milk to premature and sick babies in need. 

The charitable deals are courtesy of G-Team, Groupon's good-doing arm. The fund-raising represents a return to the company's roots: Groupon started as a social-action network in 2008 and later transitioned to offering daily deals. G-Team launched in Chicago in July 2010 and has since expanded to 65 other cities, or one-third of Groupon's markets; Indy came online at the end of August. 

Other G-Team offers have included homeless shelters, school districts and museums — essentially any not-for-profit organization. The milk bank, says G-Team spokesperson Kelsey O'Neill, was a perfect fit. "Everyone kind of has a soft spot for providing babies the nutrition they need," says O'Neill. 

After mom's own milk, donor milk is the next-best option for preemies whose mothers may be sick, taking drugs incompatible with breast-feeding or otherwise unable to provide breast milk for their infants. An increasing number of hospitals have switched to donor milk in their neonatal intensive-care units. 

SOURCE

 But the milk doesn't come cheap. Although it's donated by lactating mothers, milk banks have to pay to screen donors for disease. The banks supply bags in which the mothers freeze pumped breast milk, underwrite the costs associated with shipping and pasteurizing the milk to ensure it's safe for already immune-compromised infants. All that overhead adds up: donor milk typically costs $4.50 per ounce (30 milliliters). 

Some preemies take as little as 5 ml a day, meaning that the 132 Groupons sold could cover the cost of 9 liters (304 oz.) of donor milk, feeding 1,800 babies for a day. "That is huge," says Dane Nutty, IMMB's program manager.

I hope and hope that Groupon will offer the same deal to St. Louis and other cities around the country and that other milk banks hop on this bandwagon.  What a great service and opportunity to be able to donate a little to help a lot.  This is exactly the type of non-profiteering that I would like to build up and support (btw, Christy, this is the kind of breastmilk non-profit I was talking about before in that email...)  So, please, if you guys get a deal like this in your city, let me and others know about it so as many people as possible can "buy" (donate) and help provide life-saving, NECESSARY breast milk to babies all over the country, especially to those whose mommies can't make and/or can't afford to buy their own.

Read more: http://healthland.time.com/2011/10/10/a-groupon-for-breast-milk-of-sorts/print/#ixzz1boOXtAQw

Poor economy and diaper rash: cause and effect?

According to data from the CDC, the increase in sales of diaper cream has increased, while the number of babies born and the number of disposable diapers bought have decreased at the same time (SOURCE).

Here are the hard numbers: the Centers for Disease Control reported that the number of babies ages 2 and under fell 3% last year while disposable diaper sales slipped a whopping 9%. And yet, there was a 2.8% increase in diaper rash cream, despite fewer babies.

This doesn't necessarily mean that the sluggish economy is directly the cause of what seems to be an increase in the amount of baby butts with diaper rash, but it's definitely interesting.  Although we cloth diaper mostly full time, there are days when we don't get to the laundry, or the diapers sit in the dryer waiting to be folded and put together...those are the days we use disposables.  And sometimes, we stretch it a bit, leaving Desmond in a diaper much longer than is necessary.  I mean, the type of "longer" where the little absorbent beads start leaking out of the diaper and pepper his privates.  That's when I start to feel like such a crap mom and commit to folding the diapers and putting them together.  But also, part of it is that the diapers we buy (the huggies organic cotton ones) are so expensive.  "Why not buy the regular diapers?"  We've tried them and found them to be more plastic-y and smellier (in a perfumey way) than the organic cotton ones, so we shell out a few extra dollars for a packet of 40.  That pack usually lasts us all month, but when we get really lazy with the cloth diapering, we tend to stretch it and leave Desmond in a wet diaper longer than he should be in one.

The average American baby bottom sees 6.3 diapers a day, and with parents shelling out an average of $1,500 a year for diapers, it's easy to see why some might turn a blind eye to a slightly damp diaper (especially when disposable diapers are so absorbent nowadays)
And of course, parents are doing everything they can to meet their families' needs with less money, but is it really at the expense of their tots' tushes? 

We wouldn't be surprised if other explanations beyond parents skimping on diaper changes included folks making the switch to increasingly popular cloth diapers, others pushing potty training earlier, which Pampers marketer Procter & Gamble suggested, and even just more aggressive marketing efforts on the part of diaper cream makers and retailers.

Market research is so interesting!  I mean, isn't it cool that local health departments use a type of market surveillance that, for example, alerts public health officials to a possible diarrheal outbreak in children when Pedialyte or other oral rehydration solutions fly off the shelves in supermarkets?  Too cool.

Worst countries for women

In so many places, in so many countries, women are treated as second-class citizens. They are denied basic human rights and can be physically and psychologically suppressed by their government, community, and family members. I am so grateful that I live in a country where things for women are pretty decent: I get to pursue a degree that before was barred to so many women, I have the ability to wear and look however I want, and I don't have to ask Billy or my father or my brother for permission to do anything outside of my own home. I'm very lucky that I grew up in a part of the world and in a family that values education and freedom of thought and action. Many women, simply through their place of birth, are born into a life of forced submission and reprehensible lack of basic human rights.

As we approach the season of giving thanks, of being grateful for all that we have, think about the plight of women just like you (or your wife, daughter, mother, sister) all around the world who struggle day in and day out for a better life for themselves and their families. If you have a few minutes, take a look at the pictures in the slide show at the link below. It contains pictures of women living in the world's most dangerous countries for women: Afghanistan, the DRC, Pakistan, India, and Somalia, and keep them in your thoughts as you go through each day-to-day enjoying some of the basic freedoms that these women lack.

Adrees Latif/Reuters

World's Most Dangerous Countries for Women - The Big Picture - Boston.com

Thanks for reading!

Hotlanta

This post is just an excuse for me to post pictures of our trip to Atlanta a few weekends ago.  Billy had to attend a business conference there and I decided to tag along.  I had been to Atlanta years ago when I lived in Montgomery and only remembered going to the Underground Mall.  I wanted to visit the 3 Big Cs: Coca-Cola, CNN, and the CDC, but I just settled on CNN and Coca-Cola because I didn't want Desmond to embarrass me in front of public health professionals (a crying baby definitely does NOT get you any further when it comes to making connections and networking).

We used Airbnb again when we visited Atlanta.  We stayed in a suburb just east of the city that was only a few MARTA stops away from the city center.  It was a gorgeous house and we had a wonderful room and a big, beautiful bathroom.  We tried to tire Desmond out as much as we could so that by the time we got to the house, he would fall asleep easily (the owners stayed in another room for 2 out of the 3 nights that we were there.  Weird, yes, but we never saw them and the price to stay was only 70 bucks).  This picture is of their hammock in the backyard.

At the Atlanta Children's Museum.  He's wearing a little rain slicker thing and using the poles to "fish."

Going up the worlds largest, freestanding escalator to the CNN studios.

The News Room at CNN.  Much to my dismay, the Silver Fox (Anderson Cooper) only broadcasts from NYC.

Oh my God, the first time the Coca-Cola bear stepped out into the gathering area, Desmond's eyes lit up like nothing I've ever seen before.  He was so excited, all he could do was point at it repeatedly.  So, of course, we had to go see El Oso de Coca Cola.  I wasn't planning to buy the pictures.  But when I saw his happy little face, I knew I had to spend the $30 bucks for the set.  Billy didn't agree...but c'mon...look at his face!  (I, on the other hand, have seen much better days).  I sent this to my mom and she showed it to everyone she works with.  I was astonished because she works for PepsiCo.  She just said, "Don't worry.  I keep telling everyone that my grandson has betrayed me..." 

Winter is coming...

Has anybody ever read Game of Thrones?  I know it's being made into an HBO miniseries and has gotten a lot of buzz.  I'm halfway into it and it's just "meh" right now.  The main good guys in the book (the Starks), live in a place called Winterfell, where the threat of life-long winters is always imminent.  They always say "Winter is coming..." to emphasize that things are going to get pretty bad with the winter.  That's exactly what I've been saying to myself lately as the temperatures here in St. Louis drop to 55 degrees during the day and above freezing at night.  I am already starting to wish that fall would stay just a little while longer.  I'm not ready to endure a midwest winter yet.  And, most importantly, I'm not ready to keep Desmond inside all day.

Our backyard just as the leaves were starting to fall.

My office looking out into the backyard.

Drinking some goat's milk on a break from throwing leaves.

Frolicking in the park.

Luckily, there are a few odds in my favor: 1) our nanny is a huge outdoor person and takes Desmond outside, rain or shine, every single day she's with him.  She's been bundling him up and taking a blanket on the brisk days and we just bought him the cutest rain boots so that he could jump in puddles when it rains, and 2) we have several indoor fun options available for him in the city.

Trying on his new-to-him rain boots.  $5 at Kangaroo Kids.  And yes, mom, those are stains in the carpet and no, we didn't do them.  They were here when we moved in.  

I should start off by saying that I myself am not an outdoor person at all.  I hate being too cold or too hot, so you'll find me hanging out with Desmond outside in the spring or fall.  But you'll have to drag me out in the summer or winter (Desmond's restlessness is usually enough).  So, here's my plan for the winter months: There was a special for Gymboree memberships (2 months for the price of 1), and more than anything, it's a chance for me to be around mothers of children who are the same age as Desmond and for Desmond to play on bigger, better playgroundish equipment.

There's also a great place called the Magic House for kids.  I went in on a year membership with a friend of mine, so we get to go whenever we want for $30 for an entire year (tickets are usually $8/person).

There's also the Union Station, which has a little play area in the mall.  Desmond loved riding the rides (except we didn't put any quarters in them, so they were stationary).

Unsure of what to expect. 

Getting the hang of it.

Getting into the groove.

So excited...

And then we told him we had to leave.  He threw a fit.  :(

I'm looking into ads on Craigslist to buy Desmond a little mini-tent we could put in our living room, but other than that, I'm running out of ideas for things to do with Desmond when it's too cold to play outside.  Are there any cool indoor things you do with your toddler?  I don't want to have to take him out of the house every single day this winter, so any ideas would surely be inspiring.

Co-sleeping habits

Billy, Desmond, and I are part-time cosleepers: Desmond starts the night in his own room and then at around 1am, he'll cry out and we'll bring him into bed with us.  We have the crib pushed up right against our bed and we'll place him there when we bring him into our bed, but he ends up rolling over to be closer to me (since I sleep next to the crib) and takes up a lot of my spread out space.  Sometimes, I'll put him in between me and Billy but, like I've said before, Desmond hates to be confined under the covers, so we always have to put his little body above the covers, which makes it mighty difficult for me to roll over in any direction.  This diagram explains it perfectly (from Christopher Niemann's NYT blog, Abstract Sunday)

After weeks of sweet-talking, serenading and heartbreaking Ferberizing, we think we have reclaimed our bed. Until a short trip or a quick flu undoes everything again.

Then, the second Billy's alarm goes off at 6:30am, Desmond starts partially waking up and starts rolling around everywhere, even on top of me.  He does this, on and off, for about an hour.





And then he's awake at 7:30am.  It's not so long ago that I can't remember the sweet, sweet feeling of a full night's rest and (weirdly so) that universal feeling of a full bladder when I wake up in the morning and the gratifying release of going pee first thing (every time I wake up because of Desmond, I have to make a trip to the bathroom...so, in one typical night, that's probably 2 or 3 times that I empty my bladder).

I just keep telling myself that someday, SOMEDAY, he's going to sleep through the night consistently. And I, too, will sleep through the night.  And everything will be good and mornings won't suck and Desmond will be a well-adjusted, sleep-loving, well-rested boy and I'll be back to my chipper old self.  Someday...

(Disclaimer: we never Ferberized Desmond, nor are we open to it.  Sorry, doesn't work for us, although we've heard miracle stories of how it worked for other moms.  I think it's important to sleep with Desmond...to give him a feeling of comfort and security that he may lack by being alone in his room at night.  I want him to associate sleep with happiness (as I do) and not have it be a traumatic experience for him in the very least.  So, that's how we roll.)